“Never forget what Jesus did for you. Never take lightly what it cost Him. And never assume that if it cost Him His very life, that it won't also cost you yours.”
~Rich Mullins

Jun 12, 2013

The Joys Of Arizona!



You can say Hohokam and no one thinks you're making it up. 

You no longer associate rivers or bridges with water. 

You know that a "swamp cooler" is not a happy hour drink. 

You can contemplate a high temperature of 120 degrees as "not all that bad, after all it's a dry heat."

You have learned to expertly maneuver your vehicle under any traffic conditions using only two fingers; a skill usually learned initially in July.

You know that you can make sun tea outside faster than instant tea in your microwave.

You have to run your air conditioner in the middle of winter so that you can use your fireplace.

The water coming from the "cold" tap is hotter than that from the hot" tap.

You can correctly pronounce the following words: "Saguaro", "Tempe", "Gila Bend", "San Xavier del Bac", "Canyon de Chelly", "Mogollon Rim", "Cholla", and "Tlaquepacque", "Ajo".

It's noon on a weekday in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one single person is moving on the streets.

Hot air balloons can't fly because the air outside is hotter than the air inside.

You buy salsa by the gallon.

Your Christmas decorations include a half a yard of sand and 100 paper bags.

You think a red light is merely a suggestion.

All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October but clear out come the end of April.

You think someone driving while wearing oven mitts is clever.

Most of the restaurants in your town have the first name "El" or "Los."

You think six tons of crushed rock makes a beautiful yard.

You can say 115 degrees without fainting.

Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way in the summer. 

People break out coats when the temperature drops below 70.

The pool can be warmer than you are.

Most people will not drink tap water unless they are under dire conditions.

Monday Night Football starts at 7:00 instead of 9:00

You realize Valley Fever isn't a disco dance.

People with black cars or have black upholstery in their car are automatically assumed to be from out-of-state or nuts.

You know better than to get into a car with leather seats if you're wearing shorts.

Announcements for Fourth of July events never end with "in case of rain..."

You eat hot chilis to cool your mouth off.

You know that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.

You know that you can get a sunburn through your car window.

You have to explain to out-of-staters why there is no daylight savings time

When someone asks how far you live from a location, it's always in terms of minutes, not miles.

Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"

You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.

~A-very-ready-to-move Lisa

10 comments:

  1. Good night! So true, so true! Except that July is monsoon season, and our last two 4th of July celebrations were SOAKING wet.

    Also, if your back East friend says "Whenever it starts to rain you stop talking, even if you're in the middle of a sentence. You listen for awhile, say 'it's raining' and then pick up like you never interrupted yourself. Why is that?" Because dearie, in Virginia rain is no biggy, but back home, it's noteworthy.

    You might be an Arizonan if you dance in the rain.

    Or if you can actually remember the summer that Phx airport delayed flights, because the runway was too soft for planes to land on.

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    1. I dance in the rain!!!! And when I was in OR, they thought I was crazy, cause I'd go to the window and watch it rain :) :)

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  2. I am so happy I don't live in Arizona! Alberta is the total opposite of it! Most of the time it is cold.
    God bless,
    Rebekah

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  3. Lisa, This is hilarious!!! The one thing that was not on the list was that it is one of the few places that your hand does not get cold when you clean the toilet! Haha! I will NEVER forget the first time I cleaned the bathroom there...........it was soooo strange to me. But, I must admit it is a lot nicer than freezing. :-))))
    Love you guys........I will make room if you want to stay here!!!! Mrs. Grassmyer

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    1. This PROVES I've lived here all my life! I never even considered cold toilets!! How strange! :)

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  4. * grins * This doesn't sound all that much different from my part of Oz. ;) We have had weeks in summer that were 45 degrees C (114 F), and a few summers ago we had a day that was clocked at 50 degrees C down the road from us. Walking on the driveway in the middle of the day with bare feet is a challenge, and you get sunburnt *through* sunscreen, I'm sure! The last two summers we had were rather mild though compared to some we've had.

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