** ** ** **
For just a moment, he stopped. Not hesitated...stopped to think. In that brief moment, so many things flashed before his mind. He closed his eyes, and remembered.
Remembered that this was the single most important thing he'd ever done in his life....and the most dangerous.
Remembered that he was so incredibly overpowered by the enemy who stood defiantly facing him. He wasn't even supposed to be involved in this in the first place. This wasn't his fight. Or was it?
Remembered that there had been no impressive approval from God that this was what he was meant to be doing. There had been no "open doors" leading up to this. Quite the contrary, actually. Every thing he had tried to do to prepare for this had failed. Every thing that friends and well-wishers had tried to help with had turned into more of a hindrance than a help.
Yet for all this, there was no hesitation in his mind. Why not?
His mind refused to stop - racing back farther in his life.
What would his parents say about this? What if it failed....then what?
Most of his friends and family would probably openly praise him and say what a brave attempt it was, and then think to themselves how incredibly foolish he'd been. Speak at length about how proud they were of him, and secretly wish he'd stayed where he belonged.
Still no hesitation - why not?
All the odds were against him. In all reality, he was a still a boy - a popular, well loved, good looking boy, but what did that matter out here in the real world? The enemy was big, strong, smart, and had way more weaponry than he did.
But still no hesitation. Still no thought that this wasn't what he was meant to do....no thought that this wasn't right. Why not?
Why not? The question swirled around in his mind. How was it possible that he was so absolutely terrified, so completely uncertain....and yet so confident?
Because this was obedience.
The answer washed over him like a wave. Even though he didn't have all the pieces together, this was what truly being obedient was. Knowing what was right, and doing it....no matter what you were up against. Being recklessly confident because it was the only choice left.
His eyes were open now. Wide open.
And David ran to meet the giant.
** ** ** **
I was reading the story of David and Goliath yesterday, and was hit by how amazingly reckless David was.
How often in our modern world do we over-think a decision?
Do we try too hard to "make sure this is God's will"?
Do we wait too long for the door to open when we should just kick it down ourselves?
"Closeness to God is not about feelings. Closeness to God is about obedience. It's just as simple as that."